FAQ

What’s a FAQ? A F.A.Q. is a series of Frequently Asked Questions. I supply the answers after each question so that this is both informative and accessible. Below I will list the most frequently asked questions that you (the readers) give me and my responses.

Can I ask rhetorical questions? I don’t know, can you?

You just answered a question with another question. Isn’t that a little cheap? Well it worked for Socrates and Jesus.

State-sanctioned execution also worked for Socrates and Jesus. Whoa now, there’s no need to be hostile. Why don’t we put down the knives and sort things out. Moving on…

Umm Justin, where are we? What did we do last night? To your first question, we are at an old friend of mine’s place. Don’t worry; they are at work, so we have a few hours to get composed. To your second question, you obviously ingested large quantities of alcohol and other illicit substances. And then we played Axis & Allies.

That’s all? Yes. And then we screwed.

Oh.

Can I have your baby? I wish you could, but it kept making these really annoying noises and it left messes everywhere. So I returned it for store credit. Sorry.

How did you get so devilishly charming and witty? I get that all the time! I think I get the devilishly charming part from my grand-pappy, Beelzebub. As for my wit, after the major studios ran out of all the money they made by broadcasting every episode of every show online, I bought Tina Fey from NBC. I keep her in my basement. For every joke she makes, I give her five minutes of “outside time.”

Really, Satan’s your grandpa? I was expecting you to go with the usual “son of Satan” routine. I was too, but then Tina Fey stepped in for the save. She used to be really uncooperative, always starting fights and shanking her neighbors. But now she’s gotten into the weight room in a big way. It’s been a total turnaround.

What are the five types of glia cells and their functions? Well, the star-shaped astrocytes help synchronize the activity of the axons and enable them to send messages in waves. The miniscule microglia function as if they were part of the immune system, since they remove waste material, viruses, fungi, and other microorganisms. Both oligodendrocytes of the central nervous system and schwann cells of the peripheral nervous system build the myelin sheaths that insulate axons. And the radial glia, a subgroup of astrocytes, migrate neurons and help grow their axons and dendrites during embryonic development.